We had mostly packed the day before, but packing and packing up the car are two very different sports. Honestly, is it possible to purchase a car‑extension? A boot‑annex? I was wishing for a honest to goodness tardis where is is bigger on the inside. I don’t know how Matt packed it all in, but somehow we were still not done.
I was up before Matt because I had cleaning to do. I wanted to hand over the house spick and span, hopefully close to how we walked into it and that was a challenge I accepted as it really was immaculate. I chased some dust out of the house, emptied the fridge, and made Matt an omelette to set him up for the day. I had half a cheese sandwich,
We were heading south back into Germany. I’m going to miss the roads in Denmark they remind me of toyland, where everything is miniature and calm and nobody seems in a rush to get anywhere.
Matt had planned a mid‑way stop at Ikea because apparently we don’t have enough scrubbing brushes, and I have fallen deeply in love with the yellow towels that wrap around you three times. Big yellow towels. We needed more. Many, many more.
While in Ikea, we stopped for lunch. Matt had the classic meatballs, mash, and peas covered in what we hope wasn’t mushroom sauce which he loved, and I had salmon fillet with mash (sadly no peas). Matt loved his meatballs, and I was delighted that the mash didnt match my Whitby Mash. Last night I made mashed potatoes without a masher and improvised with a sieve instead. Matt has now declared that this is the new official method.
After snagging the yellow wraparound towels and some cheeky ginger thin biscuits for Cherry, Matt went to the loo while I waited. He left the store, couldn’t find me, and then returned. He was genuinely contemplating asking staff to tannoy me which would have been hilarious, especially in a German store, but he eventually found me sitting on a sofa waiting. By that point, I was starting to worry he was stuck in the loo.
We set off again, and it was an epic journey just to escape the town. We saw Ikea several times on the way out, as if the town had a magnetic force trying to pull us back in.
We arrived at a lovely quiet restaurant and hotel in the middle of nowhere and parked the car under an old‑fashioned elegant lamp post. The room was large but had no kettle. The light switches were all in the wrong place, which made for exciting unplanned game of switch‑roulette later.
After an hour of watching a German zoo programme in which I understood roughly one word in ten we headed downstairs for pre‑dinner drinks and a quiz. Then we ordered dinner: a burger and chips for Matt, and a vegan currywurst and chips for me (made out of pea protein). The food was delivered by a robot. An honest‑to‑god robot with big eyes that said hello. I nearly adopted it.
We had pudding because why not. I had a Chocolate Bomb and Matt had a bitter coffee ice cream thing. I think it’s fair to say I won.
Bed was calling along with the roulette light switches.